Envy.

by witnessthefire


Okay, so are you ever really jealous of something you really shouldn’t be jealous of? I get this way to often.

Sometimes it’s when a cute couple walk past and I just sit down alone and eat a packet of crisps because I just want that so much I can’t do anything, but usually it’s about friends.

I’ve recently noticed that I chase my friends. It came to me when someone asked me oh, is Sonia chasing Maya again? and I just thought about the whole process of one friend chasing another and I realised. I chase my friends because I legitimately do not feel good enough for them, I am way to messed up. And because I chase all of my friends and I love them, and are over protective of them I get jealous if another girl is chasing my best friend.

This happened today, and when I heard it I had to stop moving just to think about it. Before I even had time to properly register that comment, I had already come to the conclusion that she had moved on. I mean why would anyone like me more than her? They wouldn’t. So, yeah, I think I’m losing my best friend.

And the jealousy hurts just as much as the heartbreak.

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